It’s not perfect but it’s real.
If one should say a word that will be closest to cover most of me, that word must be “a dreamer”. When you are a dreamer, you aim high, feel high, fall from high above, and you are always in a perpetuum mobile state of search, research and inner search.
The downsize, though, is you never settle.
You always have the feeling that if you settle now, you settled for less and the grand, the unexpected, the marvelous is there, on the other turn, on the next stop, in the coming year…
Actually, the reality is happening in every second of our life. Denying it is like you are denying your own life. I am in a constant denial of my life ☺. Instead of where I am now, accepting what I am doing now, I see myself always somewhere else. Today I might be in America, then I am on a motorbike to Asia, then I accept my nest in Brasov while I am visiting my friends in Bucharest on my way to Constanta to grab a stone from Vama Veche, you get my point ☺. Moving to Germany is really the last one on my list ☺.
Growing up (yeah, I know…☺) and facing a new stage in my life, made me a happier person, let’s say content. The rush of my 20ies was well used, I could say, so now I can let things go and just embrace the present and be happy about the things that I have and about the things that I don’t have. Letting go things that you don’t have should be ones strongest lesson in life. We should be thought this in schools, but except we are learnt to always chase things we don’t have. Happiness, Confucius said, is the state you experience when you don’t have desires anymore. Now, my people that know me, they would argue I am in perfect opposition with Confucius. I used to be, thinking that achieving those things will bring you at the end of the rainbow. Now, I am confident enough to moderate my desires in accordance with what I want and with who I am as individual. Socrates got it right when he stated more then 2000 years ago “Know yourself (thyself)”, so even if we knew the truth we went as far away from it as possible, dressing up with costumes the society designed specially for us. I am happy to see nowadays people trying to get back to their own, to belong to themselves and live accordingly to their believes.
Like I gave up my Max Mara brand to dress from a small entrepreneur that designs clothes made out of organic cotton.
This is all fine, trying to get to know yourself, trying to live according to your believes, but what should we do with our continuous state of mind of dissatisfaction, unhappiness, search of better and grander?
If you accept/settle with a partner now, and the perfect one shows up 3 years from now, what happens? Do we start on lying, cheating, dreaming of being with that person while we spend our vacation with our partner? If you get bored with the routine of your partner, what happens? Are we looking to bring adventure in our life?
How can one settle knowing this? Or people just don’t think about these realities in the actual present and … que sera sera?
Aren’t we lying to ourselves?
Mankind finds itself torn between these 2 concepts, I guess:
1: “The visionary lies to himself, the liar only to others.” Nietzsche
2. “There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn’t true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.” Kierkegaard
One is not free as long there is the constraint of making choices that are not in line with ones mind and soul. Or are the constraints the base of our society?
The more you think, the more complicated it gets, so to keep it simple, try an exercise every day of being present where you are and being happy with being where you are.
Reality is not perfect, but it’s real. The chase has 50% chances of success and therefore 50% chances of failure. Humans come with a huge bias, though: thinking that there is a perfect scenario.
I rest my case.